Sunday, March 1, 2009

Bueller


So I covered the premier of the Broadway play Guys and Dolls tonight. In the press line I was standing between a girl from Seventeen Magazine… and one from Vogue.com

Seventeen (dressed and looks like a 14 year old) “Like I am so happy to be here!”

We were outside in the cold and it was snowing… if I did not need the money this would have been one of those time I would have declined the job.

They had the reporters standing over the subway vent things (like a sewer system) I was glad I wore flat boots, but the Seventeen chick and Vogue girl had on heels.

Vogue “I cannot believe they have us standing on this. There is a chance we can fall in!”

Secretly I wanted to fall in. Then I could sue the theater, the pr firm who arranged this setup and the city of New York. “I’VE FALLEN AND I CAN’T GET UP!”

Me “Well just stand to the side until the celebs come and then plant your feet. Just be careful not to move.”

Vogue (turns to a friend she brought with her) “Can you take my credit card and go buy me some flat shoes. Make sure they match my outfit!” (was she serious with this?)

She was. With that her friend took off running towards Madison Avenue.

Seventeen “So, I don’t know any of the celebs on the list.”

Me “That’s too bad.”

Seventeen “I don’t watch TV”

How are you an entertainment/red carpet reporter that does not watch TV? Complete and utter blasphemy!

This was not really an A list thing. Most of the “celebs” that walked buy I did not talk to.

Seventeen “Do you know who that is?”

Me “Ana Ortiz”

Seventeen “Who is she?”

Me “She plays the Hilda the sister to Ugly Betty on Ugly Betty.”

Seventeen “Oh, I guess I should talk to her?”

Me “Ugly Betty is a prime time show… perhaps you should.” (Can I get her job?)
Ana come near us and Seventeen starts asking all these stupid questions like what is your favorite broadway play? Would you ever do broadway? YAWN! Then it was my turn.

Me “Can I just say you are fab in Ugly Betty! You have this glow about you! What are you using!”

Ana “Well I am 6 months pregnant but we are hiding it on the show!” (She goes on about her pregnancy and all the anti stretch mark creams she uses and blah blah blah blah) Not wonderful quotes, but better than all those damn Broadway questions.

When I was done asking all my questions… seventeen turns to me.

Seventeen “Wow, you really got her to open up! I would have never thought to ask her that.” This girl was wack.

Me “May I ask how long you have been at Seventeen?”

Seventeen “Well, I’m from Ohio. I go to school here. One of the editors is a family friend.” (side eye)

Meanwhile Vogue chick had just received her shoes. Now she felt like she could work.

When red carpet was over… we were told “Thanks have a nice night!” FALSE. I wanted to see the show. How do you have me covering an event that I can’t even go inside.

Me (to PR lady) “Excuse me, where is my ticket?”

PR “We did not give press tickets” GRRRRRR

That’s when a man overheard this exchange and just handed me a ticket… said he had an extra. I thanked him and went inside. FRONT ROW CENTER!!!!!!!!!!! I was seated right next to Matthew Broderick… Mr. Ferris Bueller. But most important…. Husband to Sarah Jessica Parker… Star of my favorite show SEX and THE CITY! I must have been sitting in her seat since she was not there. WOW the seat that would have been Carrie Bradshaw! I felt special. I asked him to adopt me… but he just laughed.

Me “Wouldn’t it be fun to have 2 Jessica’s at home!”

Matthew “Ummm… it would be confusing.”

Me “We could work it out.”

Matthew “Ummm no”

Can’t blame a girl for trying!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

LOL, ur nuts for asking Matt that! Love it!