Homecoming Week

("Stop, drop, shutem down open up shop! Oh, No, THAT'S A ROUGH RIDERS ROLL!")


I might be one of the few people who will admit that they had a BLAST in high school! One year during homecoming week I realized the importance of communication.

My BFF Dawniece and I were in charge of making the morning announcements. We took this job very seriously (yeah, right). WE CLOWNED our way through this. ANWAY during homecoming week we had to announce the theme for the next day so students could dress appropriately to show their school spirit.

Over the intercom

Me (extra corny) “Hey Dawniece!”

Dawniece “Hey Jessica!”

Me “And good morning Roosevelt Rough Riders!” (Our mascot was hot)

Dawniece “Do you know what tomorrow is?”

Me “It’s wear your house shoes day!”

Dawniece “That’s right Riders! So make sure you rock those house shoes!”

Me “And be comfy all day long!”

As soon as we walked out the office we were bombarded with kids who did not know what house shoes were.

Demetri (everyone has a smart nerdy kid named this or something close at their school) “Um, Jessica what are house shoes?”

Me “They are shoes you wear in the house… you know… soft shoes.”

Demetri “You mean slippers?”

Me “Are those house shoes?”

That’s when Dawniece and I realized… the black students knew what house shoes were.... I guess this was a cultural thing.

Demetri “The word “house shoe” is not in the dictionary!”

Me “Well have you looked?”

Go figure. He pulls a dictionary out of his bag and looked it up. It was not there… but slippers was.

The rest of the day was the battle of the house shoes vs. slippers. I HAD ENOUGH! At the end of the day I got back on the PA and make the same announcement substituting house shoes for slippers.

The following day we got on the PA and announced the theme would be “Old school day”.

I had the perfect outfit. I was going for an Aaliyah/ Left Eye look. Sagging my overalls only snapping one strap, a throw back jersey, and some Reebok pumps all… while slicking down my baby hair.

School started at 8am… but if you wanted a parking spot you had to be there at 6:30. That’s when we would congregate in the cafeteria and talk trash about what everyone had on (kids are evil). As I walked in I saw people had a different idea of what “old school” meant. Some students were dressed 50’s with poodle skirts and stuff… some 70’s…. but my BFF and her sister were OFF THE CHAIN. They ran into the building dressed like some runaway slaves!

Me “Dawniece! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?”

Dawniece “I took it back old school!”

Me “Yea, you took it back to when blacks weren’t allowed to be in school!”

That’s when my history teacher walked in wearing an Iowa State Hoodie.

Teacher “Good Morning Jessica! Thanks for planning a day I could actually participate in. I’m wearing my old school!” (insert crickets chirping here)

The next day was pajamas day… which is forever banned at my school. Some hoochie from this “gang” called clitoris (I’m not making up the name of the gang… anyone who attended the “Velt” from 01-05 can attest to this foolery) decided to wear some lingerie straight from the clearance section of Ru 21.

Welp, so much for homecoming week.

My high school was off the chain! The parenting class had a “bring a child to school day” The purpose was to show students how difficult being a teenage parent would be. Sounds like a good idea? Not when most of the student body just brought their OWN kids to school…. HAPPY FREE CHILDCARE DAY! Let’s also keep in mind how deadbeat teenage dad had to watch as the new boyfriend walked hand in hand with baby moms and the little one into econ class. Yea, once the community got wind of that…. it was NOT a good look for the school.